5 things everyone is doing better than me during quarantine

Mashable 05 May 2020 11:15
Image: Vicky leta / mashable

Look, whatever quibbles we might have had with the digital age up until now (see: Facebook election manipulation, Reddit trolls, influencer culture, and that terrifying clown emoji), I think we can all agree that we are very, very happy that computers exist right now. We’ve Skyped into meetings, classes, and church services. We’ve held virtual Zoom happy hours, birthday parties, and weddings.

But as much as technology has eased some of our loneliness and stress, it has also been illuminating in far less desirable ways. Like, for example, the fact that I now know that everyone on social media—legit everyone—is Doing It Better Than Me during quarantine. I've assembled a non-exhaustive list of ways I'm falling short. 

Cute athleisure-wearing

Unlike Bella Hadid, who is whiling away her hours wearing sexy (but casual) tube tops and using adorable Snapchat filters, I prefer to maintain a cultivated air of abandon, and not in the whimsical sense—in the “I give up” sense. As an example: I am, at this very moment, technically “at work,” being as I am writing this article. Am I ensconced in cashmere sweats and a comfortable-yet-professional blouse? Of course not. I’m wearing a hideous bathrobe, no pants, and an Apple Watch that keeps yelling at me to breathe. 

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